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Hey Cop Dog I Want My Money Back

**Spoiler Alert! The following contains major spoilers for the movie Cop Dog.**

We rented the movie "Cop Dog" yesterday, and let me warn you, that movie was falsely advertised. The movie poster has a picture of a cute, silly, happy looking dog holding a police badge up to the camera. So naturally, we assumed it would be a funny slapstick comedy for kids about a dog solving crimes, directing traffic and writing tickets. Not so. The opening scene is in a graveyard. The Cop Dog’s cop partner was killed and his family was trying to come to terms with his death. After the first 10 minutes, I assured my kids that it would start getting super funny at any minute. “Get ready, because as soon as all this death stuff is over, this show’s going to get hilarious!"

Well, I was wrong, it actually got sadder (is sadder even a word?). At that point, I couldn't take it anymore, so I assured the kids again that it would get better and then went into the kitchen to drown my sorrows in some cereal. After a bowl of Lucky Charms and a bowl of Frosted Flakes, I felt much better and I went back to the show to watch the hilarity ensue. I sat down and had the following conversation with the family.

Me: Is it funny yet?

Family: No. Cop Dog just died.

Me: What!?! Oh he did not.

Family: No really, he did.

Me: No. No way. He’s probably just pretending. He’ll turn out to be alive. Trust me guys.

Family: No, he was hit by a car and died.

Me: No he didn’t. Stop saying that. They wouldn't kill Cop Dog, he's the main character!

Husband: (basically yelling, sort of irritated with me) He was hit by a car and they buried him! He’s dead!

Me: You’re wrong.

Husband: (definitely yelling now, definitely irritated) “THEY BURIED HIM. COP DOG IS DEAD! THEY BURIED HIM!!! B-U-R-I-E-D.”

Me: (finally accepting it) Really? The movie’s called Cop Dog. Why in the world did they kill Cop Dog? They really should have warned us about that on the movie cover.

Son: Yeah, they should have put on the back “He gets dead in it.”

Me: Exactly. And they should have made the picture of cop dog all sad looking on the front.

If people want to make sad movies, fine, go nuts, but I really think they should make it obvious that you’re in for a sad movie before you watch it. I want a refund from the Cop Dog people. I want my Redbox $1.00 back.

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